I don’t know if you take fanfic requests or not. But I was wondering about a Wendy story where older tourists try to flirt with her and Stan swoops in for the rescue. I’ve worked retail and customers can be real crummy to the female employees, it would have been great to have a Grunkle Stan have your back.

logicalbookthief:

“So after your shift’s done, I was wondering if you’d wanna…”

“Pass,” Wendy replied flatly, eyes not flickering from the latest issue of Avoiding Eye Contact monthly.

“But you didn’t even let me finish!” the guy protested.

“I’ll be busy,” she assured, pointedly flipping a page. “Like I am now, being at work an’ all.”

“You don’t seem busy.”

It took a lot of inner will power not to sock him in his smug jaw right then and there. However, she was at work, and while Wendy wasn’t a model employee by any stretch of the word, she knew that losing her temper on a customer was a big fat no-no. So she settled for sheer passive aggressiveness.

“I’m on my lunch break,” she told him through gritted teeth. “Why don’t you go browse the gift shop?”

“Sure,” he said, flashing her a grin. “Help me pick something out?”

Her fingers clenched around the magazine cover. “What part of break didn’t you get?”

“C’mon, hey, all I’m asking for is a little customer courtesy-”

A blast of water to the face prevented him from finishing that sentence and had Wendy blinking with surprise. He fell to the ground with an undignified squawk, drenched in water, searching for the source of the blow.

There stood Stan, hose in hand, the other perched on his hip. His stance said he meant business, but not the kind that involved swindling tourists out of money.

“So what, my tour wasn’t interestin’ enough for ya, you had to wander away and harass my employees?” he demanded, and the guy, sopping wet, floundered to form words.

Her boss scoffed. “Save your excuses, I don’t want ‘em. And for the record, I will not hesitate to use this hose on creeps or the middle-aged.”

The guy sputtered, “M-Middle aged? Dude, I’m like, 20…”

“And she’s 15,” Stan spat. His one visible eye narrowed dangerously.  "You heard me, punk. Take a hike.“

He jerked his thumb towards the exit, and the guy, dumb as he was, apparently had enough smarts to head for that direction. Wendy watched him leave with a burst of cool satisfaction; and also, a warm tug of affection for the old codger who had assisted her.

“Hey, Stan,” she said, smiling at him. “Thanks.”

“Yeah, well. I know those kind of creeps when I see ‘em. Don’t worry about it, kid,” he snorted.

Of course he’d act like it was no big deal, but she appreciated it nonetheless, and continued to smile at him. Until Stan began to grow pink under the praise, a discomfort he covered with a gruff cough.

“What, we not done with the sappy moment?” he grouched. “And why’re you outside, anyway? Get your nose outta that magazine and back to the register! We’ve got chumps ready to buy merchandise!”

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Stan might not be a great boss but he’s an A+ friend (and a total papa bear at heart). I am always up for more of him and Wendy bonding. Also I really wanted to see him use the hose.

Retail can be real crummy, I’m sorry you didn’t have a Grunkle Stan, anon. Hope you enjoyed!